When the funeral is over and everything really seems to be over, a difficult period often begins. Only then will you really realize what has happened and how much your future has changed. You are often still on maternity leave, so you have plenty of time to think about what can turn into worrying. Many parents would like to be busy with their child and it is so painful that that is no longer possible. We can give tips on what is still possible:

  • Make/adjust and send the birth funeral announcement
  • How to Create a Photo Book
  • Editing the videos and making a memory video
  • Create a memory book
  • Create a keepsake box
  • Invite friends and family to look at the photos and talk about your baby
  • Reading books about infant mortality and loss
  • Listening to music
  • Tracking social media channels related to infant mortality
  • Making the grave beautiful
  • Create a memorial spot in your home with, for example, the urn
  • Choosing a piece of commemorative jewellery
  • Watching videos about grief and (baby) loss

Movements matter: it is important that you keep an eye on your baby’s movements during your pregnancy. It’s not just about how often your baby moves, but also about when, how long or how intense those movements are. Babies adopt a sleep-wake rhythm during pregnancy and it’s good to raise the alarm if the baby starts to deviate from it.

HELLP: The Hellp Foundation has made a video explaining 7 symptoms of PE/HELLP. 

Choosing Thomas: if you are told during pregnancy that your baby will die during or shortly after birth, that message cannot be understood. The parents of Thomas (USA) decide to carry the pregnancy forward and depict the five days Thomas is still alive in a penetrating and loving way.

How grief changes over time: ‘You don’t get over grief, you just learn to have it as part of your life.
View the Dutch version here

Looking into the soul, part 1 and part 2
Coen Verbraak talks to people who have experienced what it is like to lose someone.

De Verwondering (The amazement)
Manu Keirse: no longer believes in mourning; you don’t process mourning, you survive your loss and you live with it.

Fatima Elatik: talks about the loss of her baby.

Marguerite de Beaufort: lost two of her five children and a third child became seriously ill. Yet her faith in life remains great.

Straight from the heartEllemijn
 Veldhuijzen van Zanten is an actress and columnist. She is the mother of six children, three of whom died shortly after birth. A story about love, motherhood and proud mourning.

‘It’s hard for me, too’: A letter from a grieving parent

Stillbirth is still birth

After Inez
The story of Denize and Filip, who are ready for the birth of their first child. The crib, the clothes and the stroller have been carefully selected and are ready for use. One last check-up with the midwife and their baby can come. Fate strikes out of nowhere. The midwife does not hear the baby’s heartbeat during this check-up and the young parents end up in a nightmare.

Radio 1 (Belgium) Touché
 Two hour radio interview with Manu Keirse (04/06/2017). The links to listen back to the radio fragment are at the bottom of the page.

“The foundation of love” is the first video based on Kathy Beckers-Mansell’s book “Grieving after Losing Your Baby”. The book and the videos are part of the project “Grieving for the loss of a baby”, which was set up by the “Stichting Boeken van betekenis”. Kathy Beckers-Mansell is a mourning therapist and has her practice “MetJari” in Zoetermeer.

“About Bearing Mourning” is the second video based on Kathy Beckers-Mansell’s book “Grieving after Losing Your Baby”. 

“The New Family” is the third video based on Kathy Beckers-Mansell’s book “Grieving after Losing Your Baby”. 

“Seeing with the heart” is the fourth video based on Kathy Beckers-Mansell’s book “Grieving after Losing Your Baby”. 

“Drowner and beachcomber” is the fifth video based on Kathy Beckers-Mansell’s book “Grieving after Losing Your Baby”.